An exclusive interview with Steven Chow

SC: yeah, what do you want?

NP: HOW DO YOU LIKE NEW YORK?

SC: if by new york you mean the view of campus from my 6th floor dorm room, and the 5 blocks down broadway i walked to the nearest rite-aid... the answer to your question is: living my kind of life is not the way to like new york.

it's not my fault. i have summer school all day and night.

NP: HAVE YOU BEEN TO CBGB? HAVE YOU SEEN THE STROKES YET?

SC: like i said, i'm in a fucking lecture hall 7 to 8 hours a day, with two meal breaks. i'm learning how to publish things. so that one day i can publish the tonics anthology. or the blogs of neon phosphor. you know, like the journals of kurt cobain? he shot himself, by the way.

NP: HOW ABOUT THE STATUE OF LIBERTY? OR WHAT'S LEFT OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTER?

SC: okay, so imagine having to wake up at 8 in the morning to go to a continental breakfast. see, i'd have to imagine that, because i've decided to sleep through that one for the rest of my time here. then you have a 3 hour lecture. followed my lunch. another 3 hour lecture, maybe throw in an activity here and there, dinner, and yet another 2 to 3 hour lecture, before you're dead tired and want to go to sleep. they don't call it publishing boot camp for nothing. what was your question, again?

NP: HOW'S ANNE BANCROFT AND AGORAPHOBIA?

SC: bancroft's dead. as for agoraphobia, you just gotta deal with it. i'm boycotting our group breakfast, but with lunch, you simply have to eat lunch with them, otherwise you'll starve. and that's not cool. i missed dinner today because i had to go to rite-aid to pick up some bottled water. sometimes, a few drinks such as vodka and TONIC can cure agoraphobia. or make it worse. it depends on the person and their mood.

NP: SO, ARE YOU GOING TO WORK IN NEW YORK?

SC: a-ha! i brought my dynamic mic. i can actually work on the album in new york. i even found a piano in one of the buildings i have access to. it's not a good piano, the G key doesn't work, and the sustain pedal doesn't work. still, i can work around it. it's reasonably in tune. relatively speaking.

the worst piano i have ever played is at the salvation army store in pasadena. 1/3 of the keys are completely broken.

NP: SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AT THE END OF THE SUMMER COURSE?

SC: die. eventually.