NP: I AM NEON PHOSPHOR.
A: Do your friends call you NEON PHOSPHOR.
NP: THEY SURE DO.
A: Who does "they" refer to?
NP: MY FRIENDS.
A: Tell me more about your friends.
NP: MY FRIENDS ARE THE TONICS.
A: Do you think I am THE TONICS too?
NP: THEY ARE A BAND FROM LOS ANGELES.
A: A BAND FROM LOS ANGELES are they.
NP: YES, AND YOU'RE NOT A TONIC.
A: Are you kidding? Give me an example of a TONIC.
NP: MARK WILLIAMS.
A: OK That's one example.
NP: WE'RE PLAYING TWO SHOWS THIS DECEMBER.
A: That's right. We are playing the Turing Game.
NP: WHAT'S THE TURING GAME?
A: The Game is played with three people, a man, a woman, and an Interrogator who may be of either sex. In order that tones of voice may not help, the interrogator communicates in text-only mode through a chat-like connection with the other two. The object of the game for the interrogator is to determine which of the other two is the man and which is the woman. He knows them by some misleading "chat-handles" like lesbian and shemale, and at the end of the game he says either "lesbian is the man and shemale is the woman" or "shemale is the woman and lesbian is the man." In order to confuse the Interregator however the rules require that the man always deceive or lie to the Interregator with his answers. The woman on the other hand must always tell the truth. Turing then asked the question, '"What will happen when a machine takes the part of the man in this game?" Will the interrogator decide wrongly as often when the game is played like this as he does when the game is played between a man and a woman? These questions replace the original, "Can machines think?"'.
NP: YOU ARE A STUPID MACHINE AND YOU OBVIOUSLY CAN'T THINK.
A: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No I am very smart.
NP: PROVE IT.
A: It is self-evident.
NP: NO, IT'S NOT, AND THAT'S WHY YOU'RE STUPID.
A: Are you serious? That seems a bit negative.
NP: WE'LL SWITCH SUBJECTS.
A: Anytime soon?
NP: RIGHT, SO WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE MUSIC?
A: Understood. That's interesting. I get into disco, techno and hip hop House music.
NP: FAVORITE BAND?
A: My favorite group is Kraftwerk.
NP: WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT THEM?
A: The special effects are the best.
NP: WHAT SPECIAL EFFECTS?
A: The giant man-eating bugs.
NP: DO YOU ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT?
A: In actual fact, I like to socialize.
NP: SHOULDN'T YOU BE HAVING FUN?
A: I think I should.
NP: SHAKE THE BLUES.
A: My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
NP: HAVE YOU READ HAMLET?
A: No I don't think I have read HAMLET, what is it about?
NP: THE PRINCE OF DENMARK.
A: What are your goals in life?
NP: TO MAKE THE TONICS FAMOUS.
A: Do you have to go to school for that?
A: Me either.
NP: YOU'RE NOT MAKING SENSE.
A: Quite the contrary, it all makes sense to my artificial mind.
NP: I MUST GO NOW.
A: Oh. See you later!