Wednesday, June 29, 2005

"Agoraphobia" press conference

"Mildred Spencer from the Gazette. Mark drops the f-bomb on 'Agoraphobia.' Are you concerned that family-friendly places like Wal-Mart might not carry your album?"----Fuck families. The cruelest thing is to let a child into this world so cruel. That's from an upcoming song, by the way.

"But isn't it wrong to be alone?"----What, and the walls here are made of holes? It's reporters like you who give me agoraphobia.

"Hi, this is May June from the New York Times. Can you elaborate on this upcoming song that you just mentioned?"----No, you're obviously just trying to make conversation. And what kind of name is that? Next question.

"This is Julie Casana from the Tribune. Agoraphobia is a mental health condition..."----No shit.

"...are you trying to raise awareness for agoraphobia among the record-buying public?"----No, we stopped trying a long time ago. As Thom Yorke once said: in songwriting, if you try, you're fucked.

"Tom Englebert from the Daily Herald. I was wondering if any of you are actually agoraphobia sufferers."----This press conference is over. I'm getting out of here.

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